Perusing Craigslist recently I spotted this revealing little ad. It almost made me want to meet this person and find out how s/he stays so optimistic. (Remember, I said "almost".) Here is the text of the ad, and below it is my translation:
15 year old dark bay gelding pony. About 11 hands...Still have to measure him. He's so gosh darn cute. He needs an experienced horse owner. He has got a great personality...Sometimes I feel like I am dealing with a 2 yr child, but that just makes me love him more! He needs a very patient person. If you want anymore info or would like to meet him you can email. $795
Translation: 15 year old pony gelding for sale. We have finally given up on getting him to do anything useful for us. He is about 11 hands, but I'm not totally sure because you can't get near him with a measuring stick. He's so cute... that's about it for good points, he's cute. He needs an experienced horse owner (some things don't need translation). Sometimes I feel like I am dealing with a spoiled toddler because, well, he's like a spoiled toddler. However, I would like you to believe that just makes me love him more, so I am using an exclamation point! I love him so much that I want him gone! He needs a very patient person, maybe someone who is in training to be a Zen monk. All five pictures I am posting with this ad showcase his only real talent, which is grazing. For some reason, I think someone out there will pay me $795 for the pleasure of feeding this pony. Please call or email!
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